Parenting Toddlers

We have a good case of potty mouth at our house lately. One day this week, Peanut and I were having lunch at a restaurant with her father. He was teasing her and wouldn’t give her her fortune cookie. She turned to him and said, “What an a**hole.” I nearly died. It was even funnier because she pronounces “hole” like “hull.” What an a**hull. I know laughing is the worst way to respond because she’ll just swear more. And she did. It’s totally our fault. The next day, I was experiencing some road rage, and said “What an a-hole.” She said, “Why are they a**hulls, Mommy?” I tried to explain that I shouldn’t have said that and that I was just irritated that someone had cut me off. She said, “I really hate those bitches.” Then she used the phrase “bitch head” for the rest of the day. Yes, she even requested some macaroni and cheese from her bitch head mother. Yesterday, she was in the garden with her father. He and a neighbor were talking about groundhogs ruining the garden. She asks him, “Are you going to shoot those little bastards.” I swear to God. This kid is a foul-mouthed little smarty!!
She’s been a bit better since then. I never realized how much she picks up though because she (besides this week) very rarely swears. I think she must have just been observing, gathering data, and waiting for a chance to use the words.
Mistake #1 was swearing so much in front of her. Mistake #2 was laughing like an idiot when she swore. But, honestly, it is the funniest thing because her voice is so sweet. It’s like hearing your little old grandmother swear. That’d be funny too.

If your toddler is testing her swearing limits, there are some things you can do to curb the language.

First, don’t laugh! It’s really, really, really hard. But don’t do it.
Second, watch your own language. Again, really hard.
Third, have her substitute foul language for other words, like “Sugar” or “Rats.” I actually have a thirty year old friend who still says “Rats.”
Fourth, you can try time outs if the language doesn’t improve. Again, you really should watch your own language so you don’t look like a hipocrit. Kids are very sensitive to that.
Fifth, just explain why you don’t want to hear that language. Even toddlers can understand certain words are not to be said, espeically in a Chinese restaurant.

I have a hard time taking this bad language seriously. It’s about testing her limits, and I don’t choose to make a huge deal of it. She’ll grow out of it with a little guidance. In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t seem like a major problem. I know many people will disagree, but I feel confident that I can teach her acceptable social behavior! I’d much rather put up with a few swears than diapers…can