Parenting Toddlers

Our quest for Ozzie has ended. Randi, super internet shopper and queen of finding things online, has found Ozzie the Octopus Spout Covers. The funny thing is that she found it on a site I’d already searched. You can find Ozzie here. Thanks. Even if you weren’t looking for it, the Crayola store has a bunch of cool stuff - not just crayons anymore!
If your toddler is not a bath lover, Crayola makes a lot of products that are designed to make bathtime fun.
For all this good free advertising, Crayola should give me free stuff!! Anyway, they have a ton of fun things for your kids, and the prices aren’t too bad.

Too much fun. Can I use him for my baths too?

A reader left a comment on an old post about Ozzie the Octopus spout covers, which look like awesome additions to bathtime. Anyway, the reader wanted to know where to find them. I looked online and can’t find where to buy. I’ve seen a few blog posts, which again, say they are awesome bathtime additions! But as to where to buy them, I found nothing. They’re supposedly put out by Crayola but I couldn’t find them on the website. Does anyone have one? Where did you get it? This would be a cool product for a lot of our toddlers, so if you have any ideas where we can get them, please share. Thanks! Here’s what Ozzie looks like - he attaches to the spout in the bath and water comes out of his tentacles. Very cool.

We have a good case of potty mouth at our house lately. One day this week, Peanut and I were having lunch at a restaurant with her father. He was teasing her and wouldn’t give her her fortune cookie. She turned to him and said, “What an a**hole.” I nearly died. It was even funnier because she pronounces “hole” like “hull.” What an a**hull. I know laughing is the worst way to respond because she’ll just swear more. And she did. It’s totally our fault. The next day, I was experiencing some road rage, and said “What an a-hole.” She said, “Why are they a**hulls, Mommy?” I tried to explain that I shouldn’t have said that and that I was just irritated that someone had cut me off. She said, “I really hate those bitches.” Then she used the phrase “bitch head” for the rest of the day. Yes, she even requested some macaroni and cheese from her bitch head mother. Yesterday, she was in the garden with her father. He and a neighbor were talking about groundhogs ruining the garden. She asks him, “Are you going to shoot those little bastards.” I swear to God. This kid is a foul-mouthed little smarty!!
She’s been a bit better since then. I never realized how much she picks up though because she (besides this week) very rarely swears. I think she must have just been observing, gathering data, and waiting for a chance to use the words.
Mistake #1 was swearing so much in front of her. Mistake #2 was laughing like an idiot when she swore. But, honestly, it is the funniest thing because her voice is so sweet. It’s like hearing your little old grandmother swear. That’d be funny too.

If your toddler is testing her swearing limits, there are some things you can do to curb the language.

First, don’t laugh! It’s really, really, really hard. But don’t do it.
Second, watch your own language. Again, really hard.
Third, have her substitute foul language for other words, like “Sugar” or “Rats.” I actually have a thirty year old friend who still says “Rats.”
Fourth, you can try time outs if the language doesn’t improve. Again, you really should watch your own language so you don’t look like a hipocrit. Kids are very sensitive to that.
Fifth, just explain why you don’t want to hear that language. Even toddlers can understand certain words are not to be said, espeically in a Chinese restaurant.

I have a hard time taking this bad language seriously. It’s about testing her limits, and I don’t choose to make a huge deal of it. She’ll grow out of it with a little guidance. In the grand scheme of things, it doesn’t seem like a major problem. I know many people will disagree, but I feel confident that I can teach her acceptable social behavior! I’d much rather put up with a few swears than diapers…can

I was flipping through the whole ten channels I get the other night and stumbled on something on NBC. The Baby Borrowers. I had heard of it but hadn’t paid any attention whatsoever, so when I watched it, I was very surprised that real people - real, actual, live people - lent their babies to teenage couples. I have a hard time sharing the blankets with my fiance or the last bit of ice cream with, well, anyone. I can’t imagine sharing Peanut. So I had to continue to watch to see what would possess these normal-looking people to do this. And a teenager. My little sister is 15, and good luck getting her to change a diaper.

Anyway, the idea is that five teenage couples who think it would be really awesome and exciting to have a baby get to actually take care of one for a few days. They live in houses in this weird made-up suburbia or something, and there are cameras on them all the time so parents can go (the parents are in houses down the street) whenever they feel the need to. I got over the part about giving inexperienced teenagers real live children and moved on to making fun of the teenagers. Parents know that having a cute little bundle of joy is HARD!! It’s not like a celebrity baby accessory that you can give to a nanny. They cry, they spit up (one kid was AMAZING at spitting up!!), they poop, they cry some more.

I will give the teenagers a little slack. It is hard to get a six month old baby and have to take care of it. You don’t know the special tricks to getting him to sleep or soothing him. He hasn’t bonded with you. That being said, keep them away from my babies!! Most of them did ok, actually. One girl though about killed me. The baby she and her boyfriend were given was teething. Poor guy. She was trying to feed him and he’s crying and so sad. I have never seen a baby so sad in my life. He was in pain. She just keeps trying to jam the spoon in his mouth. They never once thought to pick him up, soothe him, rub his gums, or even talk to him. She finally said, “Whatever, starve then.” The mama was MAD at that and went over to talk to the girl. She told her that when you have a child, you don’t get to behave that way. You feed the child. No matter if it takes an hour - you feed the child. Understandable, and there was no hitting or yelling involved. The teenager took offense and refused to have anything else to do with the baby for the rest of the time. Her point was that her own baby wouldn’t be so hard. Ok, you’re own baby definately won’t teeth….what???? That made me mad! It also again reminded me that some people think having a baby will help make a relationship better. It is stressful - if I had to save my marriage, having a kid would not even be a consideration. Anyway, hopefully, these teenagers realize all this and don’t reproduce too young! (Not that there aren’t some very responsible, excellent teenage parents. But I’m sure they’d be the first to say how hard it is.)

Anyway, as the show progresses, the teenagers will have to care for toddlers, kids, teenagers, and elderly people. It is kind of interesting, and if you like to watch shows that make you talk back to the tv, this one is for you.

Happy Fourth of July everyone! (Everyone in the US anyway.) Is anyone planning on seeing some fireworks? The town I live in seems to celebrate July 4 two weeks later - on the 19th, there is going to be a parade, fairs, a dance, bands, and all that. Maybe we’ll see fireworks then. Who knows why they do this? Ah well. If you are, make sure you comfort your little toddlers. Big noises are scary to pretty much everyone, and especially so for little kids. Hold them while you watch and explain before hand that they’re going to be loud.

I hope everyone has a fun and safe holiday. What are your plans? Is anyone traveling?

Yesterday, I took Peanut to the beach to hang out and see her grandparents and aunt. You would think I never take this kid anywhere - she kept saying how excited she was! It was a lot of fun, though I have a good sunburn on my shoulders now. Since it’s summer, I’m sure many of you will be making similar trips. It’s so much fun, and since we went to a state park, it was pretty cheap. Here are some good things to keep in mind when you take your little one to the beach:

*SUNSCREEN!! You too, parents. You know how much it hurts to have a sunburn - imagine your kid with one. Ouch for both of you.

**Bring toys. We brought a few buckets and shovels and she was good for hours. I brought a book. If you have someone else to help you, can you at least read while your toddler plays in the sand for a loooong time.

***Bring your bathing suit. I’m pregnant and ENORMOUS, so the last thing I wanted to do was put on a bathing suit. Big mistake. Being in the water is so refreshing, and I know Peanut loves it when I play with her. Next time, I will definately wear it.

****Be preapred with swim diapers. The bathroom was a long way off, so instead of letting Peanut go without, we used a swim diaper. I still asked her periodically if she had to go, and since I’m pregnant, we made a few trips anyway.

*****Bring snacks. Peanut is a snacker. We had sandwiches for lunch, we she picked at. Throughout the afternoon, she would grap a bite. Food = less cranky.

******Speaking of cranky, nap time is not likely on beach days. Good luck trying to get your toddler to lie down for a snooze. I think you just have to forego the nap for the day and deal with a little crankiness afterward. Peanut was so tired she fell asleep in the car, which she has not been doing lately.

The beach is a good place to focus on just playing with your child. I didn’t have a cell phone, laptop, or work, so I could just enjoy being there. That can be hard to do at home when there are so many other distractions.

Have fun! Kids love the beach, and it’s pretty nice for adults too.

There was recently a problem with a 451 Press server, which caused a bunch of sites to be unavailable. And yes, of course, this one was one of them…my luck. I apologize and hope we still have some readers out there! I am taking Peanut to the beach to see her grandma - she keeps going around the house with her pail and shovel saying, “I’m so excigid.” So cute! It’s so easy to make her happy - though I wish the beach weren’t twenty miles away. That’s how it is living in a rural area. You unfortunately have to drive to get anywhere. Anyway, though, I’m trying to be “excigid” too! Anyway, I’ll be back this afternoon with new posts - at least the break re-energized me for writing! Again, sorry for the inconvenience, and I hope nothing else goes wrong with the servers.

There was recently a problem with a 451 Press server, which caused a bunch of sites to be unavailable. And yes, of course, this one was one of them…my luck. I apologize and hope we still have some readers out there! I am taking Peanut to the beach to see her grandma - she keeps going around the house with her pale and shovel saying, “I’m so excigid.” So cute! It’s so easy to make her happy - though I wish the beach weren’t twenty miles away. That’s how it is living in a rural area. You unfortunately have to drive to get anywhere. Anyway, though, I’m trying to be “excigid” too! Anyway, I’ll be back this afternoon with new posts - at least the break re-energized me for writing! Again, sorry for the inconvenience, and I hope nothing else goes wrong with the servers.

I love Katie Holmes. I think she’s the cutest little thing - I want to look like her when I grow up. And Suri is a gorgeous little baby. (I dislike Tom Cruise immensely, though). Anyway, I saw pictures of Suri with a baby bottle. This is one of my pet peeves. I try not to be judgmental about other people’s parenting, but I had to make an exception. When you’re in the public eye, I think a lot of people look at you and what you do with your children. With such a high profile kid, people may think it’s ok to let their two year old have a bottle. It’s not! It is so bad for their teeth. My little sister had a bottle for the longest time, and it caused her to have serious issues with her teeth. It’s called bottle rot and it occurs when children are given a bottle - it can happen to babies too, which is why you should never put your baby to bed with a bottle. Constant exposure to the milk or whatever is in the bottle is damaging to the litle teeth. It just really really bugs me! Don’t let your two year old have a bottle! Not only is it unnecessary, it is not good at all for their teeth. It can be hard to wean your baby off a bottle, but it is harder to have to sit with her while she endures trip after trip to the dentist or oral surgeon. I’m not exaggerating. My sister had to have oral surgery when she was about three or four. My parents were loving parents, but they overindulged her a bit too much, and couldn’t take away her “baba.” Take it away!! When Peanut turned one, I was going to rip it out of her hands! I didn’t but we weaned her away so she was bottle free shortly after she was one.
If your toddler still has a bottle, try to wean her off right away. You’ll save yourself a lot of money in dental bills and your child will be spared a lot of pain. You can try having her go cold turkey - she’ll cry for a while and put up a fuss, but toddlers are resiliant. Otherwise, you can gradually reduce the number of times she gets a bottle a day - don’t let her carry it around with her at all. Buy her a cool drinking cup or water bottle. Toddlers like to be “big kids,” so this may work to help her ditch the bottle. Ask your doctor or dentist for more ideas, but get started on it now. It is really really really bad for toddler’s teeth!!

I’m sure by now, many of you have heard about the tragic case of dry drowning that was in the news. A little boy went swimming and then went home. He complained of feeling tired (and he had defecated in the pool). He went to lie down about an hour after he got out of the pool - it was his first time swimming - and drowned. When I heard about this, I was astounded. How do you drown in your bed? Apparently, he’d gotten water in his lungs while at the pool and showed no signs of respiratory distress (though his soiling himself was probably a symptom or sigh?). His mother went to check on him and he had a white spongy material on his face. He was rushed to the hospital but it was too late. He’d drowned an hour after getting out of the water.

This just really upset me. Obviously, no one wants to hear of a ten year old dying. But the fact that he drowned after getting out of the water is really disturbing. I guess this happens though in 10-15% of drowninig deaths. People can die up to 24 hours after getting a little water in their lungs. And according to the CDC, that can happen to a child in a bath.

My thought was, “How do you know?” If your child seems fine in the water and then gets out, you would think you could stop worrying about drowning at that point. There are signs to look out for: difficulty breathing, fatigue, and changes in behavior. But the latter two could be for a host of reasons: it’s hard to know sometimes. There’s more info on the story here.

This was heartbreaking, and I can’t imagine being that poor kid’s parents. Everyone is talking about warning signs the day after it happened, but they had no idea. I would have no idea: I didn’t even think that was possible. It’s scary how little we can protect our kids.

So, why am I depressing myself and scaring other parents? It’s summertime, and more and more kids are going to be swimming. While this is far from a common occurance, it is always good to know what can happen and how you can spot it before it’s too late. I was talking about this with former Parenting Toddlers writer Randi, and she said her husband’s mother always used to tell him not to lie down for an hour after swimming. I had never heard that before, but apparently an old wives’ tale had some truth in it there.

I was thinking of things to write about, and Randi (former Parenting Toddlers writer and mother of two great kids) told me about Bento boxes. She has a neighbor who is Japanese and introduced her to the idea. A Bento box is a single portion takeout or home-made meal common in Japanese culture and usually has rice, fish or meat, and pickled or cooked vegetables on the side. As you can see in the above picture, the food looks not only tasty but healthy. Another benefit, as Randi pointed out, is that it is economical. The meal in the above picture uses food mainly from dinner the night before. This is a great way to use leftovers - which I know I have a problem with. They also help with portion control. Other cultures eat way less than we do, so we don’t always have a great sense of portions. These boxes can help you eat a balanced, nutritious meal and stay within your portion.

There are different ways to use Bento boxes: packing one for your older child’s school lunch, preparing them at night for you and your toddler’s next day lunch, making them for picnics, and more. They can get pretty elaborate and there are gorgeous boxes available:

There are even contests where homemakers compete to make the most aesthetically pleasing and complex Bento box. I know I would have a hard time rolling out of bed and preparing a gorgeous nutritious lunch for my child. I would have all I could do to slap together a peanut butter sandwich. With Bento boxes, you can make it easy on yourself. You can just get a tupperware container or a child’s seperated container or plate and put together some leftovers from dinner. If you want to get more into it, then you can always progress.

It can also put some fun into your toddler’s day; and if you want, you can explain how it comes from a different culture. It’s just something to try if you need a switch in your routine.

Summertime is here! Over the Memorial Day weekend, Peanut and I stayed at a cabin on a lake near our home (an almost free vacation!). It was too cold to swim, but she had fun dipping her feet in the water and shoveling dirt. Summer is a fun time, and Peanut loves to be outside, so I was trying to think of special things we could do together. If you can’t make it to the beach, you can bring the beach to you with this fun craft. (I found it at about.com, where they have a bunch more fun things you can do with your toddler).

Sand Picture

Material

Remove the glass from the picture frame and clean.
Pick out a favorite picture or drawing.
Lay the piece of frame glass on the top of the picture.
Use a black permanent marker to trace the picture onto the glass.
Have the kids place clear drying glue on the glass where they want the same color. (One colour at a time) For instance, blue - Fill in all the areas of the picture on glass that they want to be blue with glue.
Sprinkle the coloured sand onto the wet glue.
Tap the glass to settle the sand and to loosen any that is not glued down.
Pour off excess sand back into bowl.
Repeat for next color next color until the picture is all filled in.
Allow the glue to dry overnight. Place the picture back into the frame with black marker showing forward. BEAUTIFUL !

This looked fun - I didn’t know you could color sand. I loved this because it is a pretty cheap activity. I’m going to try it with Peanut and I’ll post the results so you can see if it’s something you’d be interested in. Even just playing in the sand is nice, if you have a playground nearby. You can also make your own sandbox at home. My mom is doing this for Peanut. She’s using an old wading pool (perfect if you have one with a leak or something) and filling it with sand. Peanut loves to dig, pile, move, and get dirty. I love little kids because they don’t need beaches or vacations to have fun.

I wrote a while ago about my daugther’s grandparents wanting to take her to Florida for a week in a few months. I think I have decided not to take them up on their offer, although I appreciate it and will definately let her go when she’s older. Anyway, we let Peanut go on an overnight last week to see how she’d be without us. I thought she might need her mommy at some point and was prepared to pick her up in the middle of the night.

Nope. I don’t think she missed me one bit! She usually spends Fridays with her grandmother and aunt (I am VERY lucky!), so they just kept her for the night too. I stopped by at around seven to say goodnight. Now, if I really thought she’d get sad seeing me and then having me leave, I wouldn’t have done that. I knew she’d be ok with it and I missed her! I had to give her a hug and a kiss for the night. Anyway, I went there, and she was just as happy as could be. Running around and having fun. She barely noticed when I left.

I’m glad she was fine with it, really I am. It’s good to know so we can drop her there and not have to worry when we go to the hospital for the new baby. She can just stay with them as long as she needs to. And she can go on littler trips with them and be fine.

That’s great. She’s so secure. That’s what people try to tell me anyway. A little sadness would have been good for my ego - she’s two. She should miss me! She had a great time with her grandparents, slept great all night, and didn’t want to come home the next day. It’s a little sad for me that she’s so independent! I know that’s the goal, and I know it makes my life easier to have an independent kid, but I guess I equate clinginess with love sometimes. Not good! I know she loves us. I feel like I’m trying to convince myself here. It does make me feel good when she gives me a random hug and says, “I need you, Mommy.” She does this when she’s tired or feeling a little lonely. I’m trying to learn how to enjoy these little things before she stops doing them altogether.

For now, I can be assured that she feels secure with her father and me. She’s not afraid to try new things or go to new places, which is something I can learn from her. But she’s not going to Florida. I’m not ready for that yet.

I know why some ancient cultures (and still some today) see a baby and say things like “Oh, that’s such an ugly baby,” to the mother. They do that so the gods won’t take notice of the baby and cause something to happen to it. Whenever I brag about one thing about Peanut, she starts doing the opposite. And vice versa.

I talked about naptime and sleeping and how good she was, and after that, boy, did we have trouble getting her to bed at night. She started freaking out on a regular basis at bedtime right after that. (I swear she can read and does this to irritate me!) On the other hand, I talked about how hard it was to potty train her, and right after that, her new favorite phrase is, “I have to go potty.” She goes and opens the door, turns on the light, and takes off her diaper by herself.

Everything does happen in its own time. She’s ready now. Everything is a stage. As soon as you get done complaining about one thing, it’s over. And a new thing usually pops up to take its place. I still helps to complain and get advice, but it does pass, which is comforting. It also means you’re never done parenting. It’s quite a job, isn’t it??

Happy Mothers’ Day to all the moms out there. I hope you have a great day with your families. My partner has to work on Sunday, so he gave me beautiful flowers and a candle today. My favorite part, though, was when my daughter went outside and came back with a fistful of dandilions, which she calls dandiflowers. She gave them to me and said “Happy Mother’s Day.” It was so cute! She then told her father “Happy Mother’s Day,” but it was still cute! That saved her because she has been being a beast lately! More about that later…I’ve had an attack of laziness for the past few days. I promise I will post something new on Monday. It’s hard to get going sometimes. I’m sure I’m not the only one with that problem! Anyway, Happy Mothers’ Day! See you Monday.