Another Baby
A good friend of mine recently e-mailed me and told me that she was expecting her second child. Her daughter is a little over 2 years old, and she’s in her first trimester. This means that her daughter will be almost 3 when her second child is born. Everyone wonders when it is the right time to have your second child. Should it be soon after the first one, so that they grow up around the same age, or should it be later? Toad and Babygirl are 3 1/2 years apart. I found, for me, that it was the prefect amount of time. He was old enough to understand that I needed to take care of the baby sometimes, and it was easier to get him involved and helping out. Now they love each other unconditionally - sure, they fight occasionally, but most of the time they play really great together, because it’s very clear who’s older and who’s younger.
So what is the right age to have your second child? Whatever seems right for you. I do think that at least two years is a good seperation, as then it’s a bit easier for everyone. When you have two children who are a year apart or less, you will spend a LOT of time and money on diapers and your stress level will be much higher. There are certainly some parents who are great at having children who are really close in age, but I think that the majority of people do better to have a break between baby #1 and baby #2.
I also think it’s better for the first born. It’s hard to have a new baby come into the house, and the older child is often easily forgotten about in the wake of the new cuddly, sweet-smelling baby. One good trick? Have your child go out and buy the baby a gift and have the baby buy your firstborn a gift as well. When Babygirl was born, Toad bought her a little puppy, and Babygirl “bought” him a bath toy that he’d been wanting. It started things off on the right foot and helped him to realize that she was going to be his baby as much as she was ours. He did a lot of running to get me a diaper and helping to hold the bottle when it was time to feed her.
So what do you think about how far apart children should be?
February 11th, 2008 at 5:26 pm
My hubby just told me a couple of days ago that he thinks that we should try for another (after bugging him for over two years!!). That will make our children around 5 years apart. Not what I would of chosen, but heck if it means that I can have another then woo hoo!